Today’s subject is one that many pet guardians try not to think about (when in reality it may be at the back of their mind as their pet ages). It’s euthanasia.
In truth, it’s a great gift and a mercy when our pets are suffering.
Yet, we dread it, we pray we never have to make ‘that’ decision.
The problem that putting our fingers in our ears and ignoring that possibility can have big consequences.
As I explain in this week’s video, if we ignore that issue until ‘it’s time’ we end up having to navigate it whilst being incredibly upset and overwhelmed.
That can have significant consequences and leave us with huge regrets later.
This is what vets dread.
I decided to write this post after reading a post on Facebook (you can read it and my response here on my Facebook page), where a ‘tired broken hearted vet’ begged people to stay with their pets for euthanasia and not leave them with the vets – as the pets would desperately search for their guardians whilst the vets tried to comfort them. I can’t imagine how hard that was for the pets and those vets.
Yet, I also was aware of how incredibly hard it can be for pet guardians in that moment. As I said on Facebook I know that for some pet guardians the grief and emotion at this time can be truly overwhelming and for those overtaken by grief to the extent that they can’t ‘be in the room’, and that the decision to leave the room can haunt them for years.
That’s what I want you to hear today.
Please plan now so you can ‘get it right’ later.
When I ask you to plan now, I’m not being morbid. I’m speaking from witnessing the experiences of those who deeply regretted how it unfolded.
It’s never going to be ‘easy’, yet, if you are prepared, you can make it less traumatic for everyone concerned, including your pet that you are saying goodbye to.
There are three steps that I suggest you follow. I work through these steps with my clients and I see how helpful they are.
1. Know your options.
Find out what is possible in your area.
Can your local vet arrange a home visit to euthanise your pet?
If they can, it’s often the gentlest and least distressing route. Your pet is comfortable at home, in familiar surroundings with the family.
If it’s not possible, would another vet perform that service?
If you have to go to a veterinary clinic, contact them to discuss their options and find out the procedure e.g. is it a two part injection.
If you know what is going to happen it helps you to cope and to reassure your pet.
2. Have an ally
I advise people to have a close family member or friend who is friendly with your pets and to discuss with them the possibility of being ‘on call’ as an ally if the need arises.
That way, you have someone there for support, to drive there and back and, in worst case scenario, if you ‘lose it’ and leave the room, you know there is still a friendly face there.
3. Don’t hide from your emotions.
I know people who have literally worried themselves sick for months wondering about their pet’s mortality.
They try to push the emotions away, they try to ‘keep going’ but they are in inner turmoil.
In my opinion, this hiding from emotions rather than facing them contributes massively to overwhelm if they have to euthanise their pet.
Please know that there are ways to work with your thoughts and emotions so you CAN be present for your beloved pet ‘at the end’ even if the very thought of it reduces you to tears or hysteria.
As I share in this week’s video, see below, the sooner you do the inner work emotionally, the more you can focus your thoughts and energy on being truly present for your pet and their needs when it comes to the end of their life.
My wish.
I’ve written this post to encourage pet people to think and choose differently.
Whilst we love our pets dearly, often society doesn’t address or recognise the grief of losing an animal companion or the anticipation of it (pet loss grief can start long before the animal dies).
I sense a stigma around the emotional turmoil and overwhelm faced at this time and I wish that more pet guardians would reach out for help when they really need it.
The more we are willing to acknowledge rather than bury away our feelings about it and mentally and emotionally ‘prepare’ in advance, the better able we are to cope with ‘the goodbye’.
I teach techniques to help you cope emotionally and I introduce one of them, EFT Tapping, in both my free video series about helping your pets to heal and the Golden Oldie Pet Love Challenge,
These are free resources to help you help your pet.
If you need personal support then book a free call with me to find out how I can help you to stay strong and support yourself and your pet emotionally and energetically, so you can be the best advocate for them and make the most of every moment with them.
If you have a friend who might benefit from this post, please share it with them.
Also, I’d love to hear your story. Have you struggled to stay strong for your beloved animal companion when it was there time to go? Are you dreading that possibility?
Or what helped you get through? Let me know in the comments below this post.
Thank you,
Ferris.
P.S. It’s been a while since I’ve posted, quite a while.
Since my sweet Sally dog died last October, I haven’t yet been ready to share the insights and teachings from my last months with her.
I will be back with another post about that soon. If you sign up for my updates or free resources, you’ll be notified when that post comes out.
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